Finding light in a period of darkness....

We've all been there. That moment where you feel everything darkening and everything collapsing around you. It feels like it's never gonna let up and you don't know what to do.

This is how I've felt the past two years. I've felt like graduation would never come and that I would not amount to anything. It's been a constant struggle of am I doing the right thing? How is a degree in theatre going to get me anywhere?

This has also made me feel two-toned in life. My dark tone being the one I have with myself. The side that is alone in my room, trying to figure things out by myself, and getting nowhere. And then there is the light tone. The one that tells everyone she is doing great, wanting to help wherever it's needed, and feeling like I've got things in control. 

I finally feel though as if I'm beginning to find the light in dark; beginning to find that one strong tone that doesn't change depending on who I am with. I've begun to realize that when I'm having trouble I can't get anywhere by myself and that I need to "mix it up" and reach out to those around me. And that it is ok not to be completely perfect. This in turn is helping me to be more confident. Knowing that im strong enough to reach out, I can be there for others without forgetting about myself. 

It's a tough line, but if I could leave you with anything, I would say don't try and handle your hard moments by yourself. There are people around that are willing to help, even if you can't see it. If it feels like you have two different tones in life, know that you need to combine those two sides into one strong life. Being able to be the same around others as you are around yourself will help build stronger relationships and you'll become more confident. At least it has for me.

Just take a look at coffee. When the dark coffee and the light cream are combined into one magical latte, it makes the entire thing one strong and delicious drink....